honestly...

Ok. I'm just gonna throw this out there. 

I loved going back to work. And I'm not ashamed.

It seems, to me at least, as if there is this intense pressure on moms to feel guilty for going back to work. People are like, "oh my gaaaaaawd, you're leaving your new baaaaaaaby, how awwwwwwful, don't you wish you could just stay home and snuggle all day?"

Bitch, no! I don't wanna stay home and snuggle all day. Been there, done that. I LOVE my daughter. I ADORE her. My not wanting to stick around at home all day has NOTHING to do with her. It's all about me. And if I've learned anything at all from being a new mom, it's that you need to do what's best for yourself so that you can do what's best for your child. 

Now, this totally all depends on what type of person you are. Some people would be fine staying home all day and getting things done around the house, plus caring for children, plus activities, plus more. Props to y'all. Me? If I have too much time on my hands, I don't know what to do with it. I don't do anything. I WILL sit on my ass all damn day and be exhausted from the effort of doing absolutely NOTHING. The thought of getting out the vacuum will make me yawn. Dishes will pile up. I. Am. Useless. Needless to say, my house isn't too pretty after 7 weeks of this. 

I NEED to work. I never thought I would say that about myself, but it's true. Without the daily routine of getting up, going to work and coming home, I am just a bum. I need that routine to get me going enough to do things like clean my house and make awesome lunches (see previous post). 

So - going back to work was awesome. I've never been happier to sit in a back room, alone, with a giant pile of papers to enter into databases. I missed Avery and our snuggle-naps, but there will be ample time for those on the weekends. It's like, now I have the best of both worlds (Hannah Montana, anyone? No? Just me?) - I can go to work and feel like I'm DOING something (and actually be doing something productive) AND I can come home to my sweet little chickpea and snuggle her all up. It's a win-win.